Trust

"God is my strong fortress. He makes my way perfect."
2 Samuel 22:33

-Such a small verse, with such a powerfull meaning.

It is so easy to read this verse and know that every word of it is true. But isn't it hard to truly BELIEVE it? I find myself constantly saying "just trust God. If this is His will for you than it is right.", but then trying my hardest to make God's will fit MY plans. I want to be God in my life. I want to make my own decisions, and twist and turn certain things around to fit just the way I want them. Of course this never works out for me, and in the end I just end up exhausted and frustrated and mad.

If you know me well, you know that I am very strong willed, stubborn, and a bit of a perfectionist (if you didn't know this about me it's only because I've become an expert at pretending not to care). I like things done a certain way and if you can't do it that way well then I would rather just do it myself. This certain quality about me is something that I know my husband struggles with (bless his heart), and I certainly do not blame him for it. It's a lack of trust that I have in God and in other people. It is something that I constantly need to work on although regrettfully I fall short in doing.

Ever so often in mine and Josh's marriage when we are going over finances, trying to figure out where all of our hard earned money has gone, and why we haven't been able to save as much as we thought we should have over the previose month, it becomes very easy to get frustrated at the sittuation and in turn at one another. Although our income has only increased over the year and a half we've been married, our expences seem to grow at twice the rate as well (why does this always seem to be the case?). Only after (however long the period may be) of fretting over the sittuation, we always come to the same conclusion, "God will take care of us. He always has and He always will". I may be crazy (and will not be offended in any way if you think so), but it seems that when Josh and I finaly buckle down and put our full and total trust in God, we are always blessed. Now, do I mean "blessed" with money and wealth? Not completely (although He always provides), but blessed with a peace of mind, a love that can only be shown through the Father, and in turn a deep love and trust in our relationship with each other. These are blessings that cannot be surpassed with money or wealth. This is true happiness.

As I was reading 2 Samuel 22:33 this morning it reminded me of God's blessings and Love that come with trusting His will for our lives. Trust is a struggle for me in all aspects of life, but trust is a wonderful thing and it's good for me to be reminded of the gifts that trust can bring. "He makes my way perfect". Not myself, not money, not possessions or other poeple, but GOD makes my way perfect.

Just thought I'd share.